Being Unsocial (Help regarding balancing personal life)

I am a research engineer at a company (Not a coding job, but it’s related to analyzing patents of Computer science and electronics field. so it’s a technical job). I have great interest in coding but due to my low CGPA in Btech (Computer Science), I am unable to get job in coding field. I am like I don’t live without coding. I spent almost 12 hours of day in my job (job 9 hours + travelling) so as soon as i came back home, i open my lapi and start coding. As my job is purely non-coding job, they don’t allow me to even open a coding related website in office on their sytem. So i try to give as much time to coding at home. Due to this, my personal life is going affected. My mom (my family only has me and my mom) said that i not give her enough time and don’t talk to her (or listen to her) much. Further, she said that she will leave me and go home back if my behaviour will be like that (like if i not change my this schedule). But i have to give more and more time to coding so i am getting detached to her. Further, the topics on which she wants to talk to me are bulshits (like talking about neightbours, etc. which are not of my interest). I apply to many coding companies (S/W development companies) but as i am working for 2+ years in non-coding, they don’t even schedule my interview. But i not leave coding as i already mentioned that i cannot live without coding.

Can anyone please give me some suggestions to change my schedule or behaviour or any thing that i can do to make everyone happy.

Not an easy one!

I guess you’re driving while commuting, so coding during that time is a no-no. Could you use public transport, or would that be much longer/too crowded for you to be able to code some while you commute?

I don’t know how you feel about your mom, I’m lucky enough to have a good relationship with her, so I’d say even if the topics are not particularly interesting, just listening & some small talk can do wonders for relationships.

If all else fails, you could try to set aside a couple of afternoons/nights per week to spend with your mom, and code on others.

Do you get any specific feedback on why you aren’t getting any interviews, or is the lack of work experience as a developer?


Hi there ,
did you get any replies to as why your interviews weren’t scheduled , is it mainly because
you highlight you non coding job on the resume , saying that you are into coding and you spend a lot of
time doing it wouldn’t appeal to a company , apply your skill’s to build something that you can put on
your resume , what you build will give you more confidence to take a stand in the coding field and
not be demotivated by all those rejections ,

and the other thing is that small talk can make big difference like @device said , you need to take some
time of your schedule , rethink what you have been doing all these days and prepare yourself for what you are about to do from now on , Good Luck


Thanks bro…

Actually they just write on email that that are proceeding with other candidates for now…and even not schedule my interview…

I think this is because of my bad CGPA in graduation too…

It’s is 5.8 …and remaining chances of getting interview call are dumped by my non coding background

In my past, my routine was go to school / work under the week. spend the afternoon and nights in front of the screen. Sleep deprivation was a standard under the week.
On the weekends, I never touched my pc, even if I did, only on the mornings (in relation to when I stood up of course). Weekends were social time.
I think I managed everything quiet well with this schedule. I have many social contacts and friends, am known as a great party person but also work as a pentester and a security analyst and managed to teach all the important stuff to myself BEFORE I went to university (went there in my mid twenties).
Self taught IT-(Security) skills are (from my experience) the highest valuable skills you can have, when it comes to job interviews and later in the job itself too.